That pressure you feel before a prospective client meeting...it doesn't have to be like that.

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You've got a meeting or a call lined up with a potential client to discuss the idea of working together.  On one hand, it feels great, but there's also a part of you that feels nervous, apprehensive, and underprepared. 

Maybe you even have the thought I hope they cancel even though you don't really mean it, but it doesn't stop you having the thought anyway!

The meeting feels important. You feel like you need to be at your best. You want them to say yes to working with you, and because of that, you feel the pressure, but of course, pressure, stress or nerves are the last things you want to be dealing with when you're trying to demonstrate that you're the right person for the job, right? 

I get it, and I've been there too. 

I've also learned some things since then, that has made a big difference and I'll share them with you. Because ultimately wouldn't building a business be a lot easier (and more enjoyable) if you could go into meetings with a clear mind, and connect and engage with people the way you want to?

When it comes to feeling the pressure, stress, or anxiety that something needs to go well, (I know because I speak from experience here too), it can really seem like your feelings are coming from:

- the person you're about to meet. 

- the unpaid bills next month if you don't get the work. 

- the disappointment of others who are also relying on you to get this work. 

The reason it feels like that is because those feelings come up, every time you think about it. But that's just it - 'every time you think about it'.

Your feelings are coming directly from your thinking, as you're thinking it, not reality itself.  All we ever have is now. Feelings can't come from next week, next month, or this afternoon. They can only come from now. This is because we live in the feeling of our thinking, moment to moment.

We feel our thinking, not our circumstances. It's the universal principle of how we experience life - through the power of thought, not our external surroundings. Of course, we'd all be forgiven for thinking otherwise, after all, it's a very clever illusion!

The reason you're feeling what you're feeling is because of the thought-generated-reality that's being created in your mind and you're experiencing that as real (because our minds are amazing film production studios!), but it's all going on inside, it has no reflection on what's 'actually' happening out there in the real world.

For a start, the future hasn't happened yet. Let me say that again, the future hasn't happened.  

Yet, your mind is creating entire scenarios that look and feel like the future, and you have a front row seat to all of that (and this is true for every human being), but it's a film, it's not real life. As soon as you catch on to that, you are back in reality again. Oh, I just made all of that up and believed it to be true! is something I say to myself often. It's quite a relief to realise that it's all made up (even if that realisation comes later on that day, the next morning or the following week). 

There's more good news as well. Knowing that it's all made up, takes the pressure off having to change your thoughts, or only focus on the positive ones. You know how you watch a movie, and you get so caught up in it that you hold your breath when it gets tense, cry at the sad bits, and laugh at the funny bits? Throughout all of that, you're not concerned about how you feel, because somewhere in the back of your mind, you know it's not real. Well, it's the same in our minds. Each of us has these incredible 3D cinematic movie theatres operating 24/7 in our minds - if we're living and breathing, the movie theatre is open for business! 

So when you feel stress, pressure, anxiety, nerves, sadness, anger, and any other know that you're feeling the movie in your head, not the world outside of the movie theatre. 

Photo by Anete Lūsiņa on Unsplash

Private 1:1 Coaching

"How do I get clients and grow my business without working all hours, burning myself out, and neglecting my family in the process?"

Does this sound like you? If so, you're not alone. It's the question many self-employed business owners ask themselves day after day after day. On autorepeat.  

There are two different types of days in your business. Those days when you're on it, your head feels clear, you get s*** done, and you even get out of the office on time. Yes, those rare and beautiful days. Then.. there are those days where whatever time you finished wouldn't be enough. So much to do, you feel tired, and your family hasn't seen you properly for weeks. 

What would it be like to have more of those get s*** done and feel good days and less of the I feel like s***! days? 

There is a wisdom and logic to how the mind works, and when people get an understanding of that, they discover their natural capacity for clarity, productivity, resilience, and wellbeing shows up in ways they didn't even know existed! They also find that years' of unhelpful thinking and beliefs they had (about themselves and the world around them), start to melt away. 

This is the basis of the 1:1 coaching work I do with clients. It's educational, insightful and very transformative. 

If you're ready for a fresh new way of looking at your business, life, and relationships, then let's arrange a call to explore what that might look like for you. Book yourself into my diary here

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